Opinion The benefits of having dogs in the office

By Bruce The Dog

Greetings.

It is I, Bruce, your beloved pack leader and King of all Rethink.

Some of you may question the benefits of having dogs in the office. To you I say, “Silence, Fool! Know you nothing of group dynamics?”

Of course, to your untrained ears this sound is the mere whining of a dog. But trust me, this is what I’m saying.

Oft times in meetings, many a bored client, having understandably little to say to the likes of you, has turned to me in search of conversation and hair-covered pant legs. These I am only too happy to provide.

And when the mindless crowds erupt in applause for whatever reason, I deign to bark along with them, whipping the huddled masses into an ever greater frenzy of excitement.

Also, on occasion, I have been known to finish the crusts of your pizza. I am not proud of this behaviour.

Great, too, is the need for acceptable distraction in the brainstorming rooms. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve witnessed so-called “creatives” staring blankly at walls, the silence echoing, so many thoughts unthought in the vacuum of the room as the clock ticks down. Without me to pet and discuss and fill the void, who knows how many campaigns would be lost to despair?

But sadly, all is not perfect in my Brucedom. All too often, other, lesser dogs are brought into my sphere of influence. About them I will say only this: down with Stella The False Dog. Her looks are fair, yet she is evil incarnate.

Monty and Lola, they’re OK.

For now.

And with that I must take my leave of you. I have lingered too long as it is. Crotches have gone unsniffed. Knees unlicked. Couriers waltz in and out freely, unchecked and unchallenged. This cannot stand.

And so I remain,
Bruce.
God save the king! (me)

Some further questions worth pondering:

• Do you think dogs help or hinder a creative environment?
• Oh, so you’re more of a cat person?
• What’s it like being so wrong?
• Who’s the good boy? Who’s the good boy?
• Seriously, who?

 

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